The Single Traveler: A Nasty Little Beast

Travel can be a nasty little thing. It can bring enlightenment, happiness, and spontaneity, but it can also cause confusion, deceit and loneliness. Being single can be an even nastier beast. You pair the two together and you could have a monster on your hands if you dont keep your guard up.  When I first started traveling almost 8 years ago I was snatched up fairly quickly from the dating market so could not dabble where most women would have gladly done so. It was a fortunate thing for me. I was so ignorant and naive to the dating and traveling world that I would have most certainly been taken advantage of and cocked things up royally; so instead, I sat on the side lines and watched what unfortunate things could happen to those who were unaware. Don't get me wrong, be it woman or man, I always advertise being single when you travel. I am a big advocate of remaining wholy in the moment and it is hard to do when you have a loved one at home- possible but hard.

After years of being in a relationship I find myself single in the traveling world again and it is odd. I am both invigorated at the idea and petrified because it is completely different when you see it from the other side. I no longer heckle the players because now I am one. In the past, certain things I would do or say would have been taken in jest but now...now they are taken very seriously indeed.

The past few months has been a lesson in navigating this foreign world of singledom traveling. One thing I'm beginning to learn is that the heart is a funny thing. If you mess with it, it hurts. Who knew. Just today I was listening to my roommate who, like me, is transitioning into the "Single Traveler" lifestyle. Already she has run into some rough patches and unlucky snags along the way. I found my self saying "Babe, when it comes to the dating lifestyle we live, you must think like a man. Be blunt and think black or white."

I am a proud female and saying these words did sting a little, but they held a lot of truth. You can't be vulnerable as a single traveler. It is like bleeding in a tank full of sharks. They can smell you. Or like a Playboy Bunny in a room full of nasty old men. Sooner or later you're gonna be pricked.

It is so easy to loose yourself in this lifestyle but being your own anchor will help you retain your sanity and self respect. The best advice I could ever give any single independent female about to travel the world is trust your intuition. I didn't listen to my intuition for a while and it lead me to fall down the rabbit hole. Let me just tell you it is a lot easier to fall into the hole than it is to dig your self out. So find your mantra and remember...

"I am the hero of this story. I don't need to be saved."

How I Found Happiness: Frodo to Brazil

My day started with Frodo and ended with Brazil. A typical day in the life of the new me. Six months ago I would have never imagined I lived in the wilds of Alaska and made a living out of flying to the North Pole and the end of the world (as most Californians would define it), but alas here I am. Six months ago I was half a person who could not define happiness let alone live it. But today...today I laughed and... it felt great.

My home is an airplane and my family its occupants. I  find solace in the business men, the fishermen, the doctors, the dentists, the oil drillers, the ill, the healthy. Today I enthusiastically  retold a familiar travel story at 35,000ft in the air to a wrapped audience; and I could not help but find a bit of home in this motley crew: Frodo with his charming good looks; Pinky with his hearty laugh and pure embarrassing ignorance of mother nature and human nature; and the side kick with his uncanny ability to successfully exploit these embarrassing moments of his family and friends. These people I only knew for but a moment yet I felt more comfortable talking about how to recognize a hooker from a far and how to not to look like an idiot when confronted by an Alaskan moose in mother nature than talking about the weather with my brother-in-law. Odd moments like these allow me to validate the choices I have made this past year and have caused me to find the impossible: happiness. Even though I have to come home every night to a very small studio apartment that I share with a kinky Filipina, ironically named after  a Brazilian Sex crazy party town, and a Lebanese-american woman who's never heard of the phrase "too much information", I am still very much content. As a result, I would say that I have finally made a beneficial decision and I have begun to find happiness thanks to the Frodos and Brazils of the world.